I had THE closest thing I have ever had to a panic attack in my life over the weekend.  Which is unusual seeing as how I am the antithesis.  Seriously, I NEVER freak out about this stuff.  Everyone I know refers to me as being a freak about being so relaxed about everything… However times change…

Two weeks ago, with the pieces in place to become a full-time comic book creator ,I decided it was time to give notice to my day job.  The 1st of September would be my last day. This is all fine and good except that two weeks later the gravity of the situation hits me… I’m going freelance… there are no guarantees for a paycheck anymore… crap!  I have a mortgage, student loan payments, car payments and most importantly a 3 month old baby son!!  What’s more is, I can’t go back… I have commited to a contract for a graphic novel and I have already told work that I am leaving. There are no “backsies” people.

The more I looked at it and the finances, the more I realized how important it is that I don’t f-up.  I mean everything I do has to be looking through the eyes my family as a whole.  Just cause there is a project I like doesn’t mean I can take it.  The pay has the right the timing has to be right cause if it isn’t there are three other beings ( Wife, Son, Dog ) pay the price too.  In fact it is scaring me right now to write this.  This is serious business… I have to make good decisions if I want to pay the bills. I am the only conduit for survival, I am the key to my family’s happiness… or am I?

But then I remember… my Dad worked 3rd shift from when I was 7 till I was a sophomore in high school.  He did it to make extra money.  But did that make us happy?  Most definitely not…  I never saw my dad.  We went to school when he was home and he was off to work before we got home and then we were in bed fast asleep by the time he got home and we were off to school before he got up.  The insult to that injury was that when we did get to see him ( on the weekends )  he drowning himself in alcohol to kill the stress from the job. Is this what I want to be to MY son?

But then I remember a post I read online called “Ten Reasons Not to Get a Day Job” .  The reality is that there is no security.  In fact by going with a single employer, a person who can fire you at any point is tantamount to putting all your eggs in one basket.  They are paying you to take a risk on them and their business management.  Why do you think they are willing to fork over money for all the benefits?  They need to keep you from going off and doing the business better than them!  Basically it kinda reminds me why I don’t like my day job… I’ve sold the part of my life I hold most dear, the ability to control my own destiny.   Well, no more! This is what life is made of… and I hope that that will be what I can give to my son!

PS: My Dad got layed off from his job three times in a 10 years… and then? The retired him on the last one.  He took a loss on his pension.  Day jobs are for chumps!


  1. You’re going to have a fun learning experience no matter what. If you screw up, it may sting a bit (for you and your family), but you’ll survive. There’s no need to overdramatize it as super serious.

  2. … Shut up! LOL, the man himself!

    You make a good point though…I gotta remember that my family AND I will be fine no matter what. But, that’s no reason not to use the fear to motivate me to do my best 😉

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